When moving involves getting on a plane to go to another continent, it can often be an odd sensation, being caught between two worlds, your old life and your new one. The day I moved back to New York, I was constantly faced with the question of who I was and where I came from, one all expats face when they return home.
Despite my excitement to go home, there are some key things I'll miss about Rio.
This is probably #1 on the list.
I have been spoiled rotten by the view from our two apartments in Rio, and I'm bracing myself for views of air shafts, brick walls, and parking garages.
In my time spent in Rio, I must admit that I am baffled by the range in quality of services, because though there's plenty to complain about, it's not all bad. And what is most perplexing is that you don't always get what you pay for.
Take for example, a day I went to the dentist and the post office. The post office employee, who is paid by the government, was far friendlier, more helpful, and kinder than the dentist, one of thousands in private practice in the city. People complain that government employees are awful, since it is very difficult for them to lose their jobs, but once in awhile they are in fact helpful and polite, more so than some employees of private companies.
Though I think restaurant service is, in general, fairly bad in Rio, the quality of service doesn't always correspond to the menu prices. Getting a decent server is the luck of the draw, whether you go to a fancy restaurant or to a kilo joint. In a single mall, there's a cashier that has failed to give me the correct change (or change at all) several times [I got it back], a woman who trusted me to pay but didn't want to keep me waiting while the credit card machine line was busy, a waiter who moves at the speed of molasses on any given day, and another cashier who is incredibly polite and efficient. Go figure.
In retrospect, the absolute worst service I've had is one of the most important: NET. We paid for a package for TV, internet, and phone service, and we have, without fail, had a problem every single month since we had the cable installed. There has been a problem with each and every bill, in that it has not come, wasn't debited, or was for the wrong amount. They abruptly stopped our 3 megabyte connection when Eli "surpassed" the monthly limit of byte transfer without warning (they sent an email after they slowed the connection entitled "mail" which went straight to his spam), and only restored it at the beginning of the next month. They have overcharged us twice, and though they corrected the amount, we are still dealing with the second incorrect bill. Eli has spent many hours on the phone screaming (as much as a Brazilian "screams") at the insanely incompetent staff. I'm comforted to know that it's not just us, though.
What has your experience been with services in Rio? What are the best? What are the worst?
As a big fan of Marjorie Rodrigues, I especially loved one of her recent posts about a Brazilian documentary focusing on advertising for children in Brazil. While fairly disconcerting, this kind of thing is sadly not new for Americans. And while I was just as horrified as the next person watching the full series (there are five videos), especially when the kids were unable to recognize common animals and plants but able to recognize brands, I thought to myself, "They haven't seen anything yet."
WARNING: This post is purely satirical. It is not meant to be taken literally.
Brazil has many complex problems, ones that won't be solved with a magic bullet. But I came up with some ideas of my own that could help combat some of Brazil's major problems.
10. Add the "soccer clause" to the penal code. Convicted felons would be banned from all soccer stadiums in Brazil for life. Recidivism, reduced jail time for criminals, and felonies are all big issues.
9. Offer material incentives for college graduates, masters and Ph.d recipients to stay in Brazil. For college graduates, offer a laptop. For masters graduates, offer a car, and for Ph.d recipients, offer large housing subsidies. Brain drain, like in any developing country, is an issue.
8. Rather than increase income taxes, require that people with a minimal income of R$36,000 donate two cesta basicas per year to the local food bank. The number of cestas should increase with income. Hunger is a problem, despite recent social programs to help the country's poorest citizens.
7. Ban the use of private cars on holidays. Charge a minimum fine of R$2,000 for breaking this law, and expand public transportation services on holidays. Drunk driving is a big problem, especially on holidays.
6. Put a bar in every public hospital. Might as well make the experience pleasant for the patients' family members patiently waiting to be assisted. The extra revenue could help pay for more doctors and equipment. Overcrowding and long delays are the scourge of the public health system.
5. Charge fines with a minimum of R$3,000 for misdemeanors, even ones like peeing in public and littering. If the person can't pay immediately, deduct every paycheck directly until the fine is paid. Urban chaos and petty crime in cities are common.
4. Invite Oprah to do a massive, long-term "Big Give" campaign in Brazil.Poverty is one of Brazil's largest obstacles to becoming a developed country.
3. Hire the MST to police the Amazon, going after illegal ranchers andloggers. The government already pays them, enabling them to buy weapons and supplies. They already live in inhospitable places and their purpose is to seek vigilante justice. Why not put them to work doing something useful? Environmental destruction is a major concern not only for Brazil but the whole world.
2. Add the "mommy clause" to the penal code: any time someone is convicted of a felony (murder, rape, armed robbery), the person's mother must be imprisoned along with the criminal. In the absence of the mother, the person's father would be imprisoned. In the absence of both parents, the brother, sister, or best friend would be imprisoned. The criminal and the relative would be imprisoned in different facilities, with zero contact between the two. Violence and violent crime plague the entire country.
1. Privatize Congress. Since a large portion of the federal
government's corrupt politicians come from the legislature, and since
many of the government programs Congress oversees are poorly run and
also corrupt, why not try an alternative? Privatization has proved a
boon for other previously public government organisms (Vale, Metro Rio,
Telefonica, etc). It would help with accountability, efficiency, performance, and
transparency. Corruption, particularly with this branch of government, is historical and one of the country's most frustrating problems.
One of the things that I suspect foreign businessmen know little about is the ridiculously high number of pirated, black market goods circulating in Brazil, especially in the major cities. Hollywood executives would be especially horrified to see just exactly how much money they're losing in one of Latin America's biggest markets.
In Brazil, pirated DVDs, CDs, and video games are the most common, and millions of reais are lost each year to these black market goods. DVDs of new movies not yet in theaters or even in the country are often released beforehand (Eli's cousin watched the Wolverine movie weeks before it was released, and it was even missing some of the final editing), and you can find nearly every film currently in theaters out on a pirated DVD. In fact, for every 10 DVDs purchased in Brazil, 6 are sold illegally.
In recent years, the most notorious incident involving pirated DVDs was the Tropa de Elite debacle, since the movie was seen by millions of people (including myself) on leaked, pirated DVDs months before the film was released in theaters (it was still the highest grossing Brazilian of the movie of the year, though).
The Brazilian government has half-heartedly tried to bring attention to the problem with a series of public service announcements trying to show the link between drug trafficking, violence, and pirated goods, as well as emphasizing the illegal nature of purchasing black market goods, shown below. The third is a very funny parody of the most famous commercial.
But when you put things into perspective, it makes sense. It costs between R$10 and R$20 for a movie ticket, in a country where minimum wage is R$465 (US$232) a month. There has been a lot of abuse of student IDs to get into cinemas, so theater companies have made it increasing difficult to get a discount (to ensure that people are using real IDs). Legal DVDs cost somewhere between R$20 and R$40. Video games are prohibitively expensive, and cost between R$100 and R$300, depending on the game system. Not to mention that the Brazilian middle class supposedly has the highest tax burden in the world.
Meanwhile, pirated CDs and DVDs cost between R$5 and R$10 (in Rio, DVDs are generally R$5), and pirated video games cost around R$10.
