reuniting

One of the best things about being home is reuniting with old friends. I can't describe how wonderful it is to see these people I haven't seen for a year, the people I can tell anything to, the people who share my interests, and the people who know me best. I've had a flurry of outings, lunches, dinners, and coffees in an attempt to see as many old friends as I can, but with less than a month left, I'm not sure I'm going to see everyone I want to see.

It has made me realize that one of the things missing most from my life in Rio is close friends, especially female friends. My mom would shake her finger at me (I think she has, over the phone while I was away), but it's not for lack of trying that I haven't seemed to manage this yet. I know other people in similar situations who also have this problem, so I don't feel alone.

So as much as I can, for my remaining 3ish weeks at home, I'm going to continue to matar those saudades, one by one.

Comments

[Cheryl]

I´ve had a hard time making friends in Brazil too. I find that people here (at least in Salvador) have a lot of trust issues with new folks, and most people´s friends are friends they have had since childhood, so it´s hard to break into "the circle". Also, I had some bad experiences with people trying to take advantage of me financially because I´m a gringa and therefore MUST be filthy rich (yeah right!). So now I pretty much have my girlfriend and I hang out with one of my students a lot, but he is a guy and while is super nice, it´s not like having my close friends who I can really talk to. Enjoy the time you have there with your friends!
-Cheryl

[Corinne]

Brazilian set their social circles early in life, usually in high school and it usually does not change that much unless the person goes through some transition event, like moving to a new city or having kids. Since most don´t leave to go to college, even having close college friends is not a given (like what usually happens in the US). I have found that I make friends with people open to expanding their social circle for whatever reason and even then it takes time. There is a wonderful story that I don´t remember who wrote about two men who met up every weekend at the same place in the beach with their families for 20 years, but never even knew where the other lived because the entire friendship was restricted to that meeting on the beach. However, Brazilian friend, once you make them, do last.