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December 30, 2009

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Roberto Sidney

I was not going to but since some nice people asked about me I’m doing some explaining.

First of all wish best of luck and happiness to Rachel “Gringa” on the path unfolding in her life.

I had some posts removed due to some harsh thoughts on David Goldman’s behavior and even thought I had wondering about that before, I never wrote then since some of them are just opinions, some facts and I would hate to go against a father fighting for the universal right to his son. Based on recent events I felt compelled to share it and see what might be right or wrong about then since I’m far less knowledgeable than most of you on Sean’s case.

They were removed ruled as slander and lies. It was explained as “moderation” not censorship. As I've seen moderation for stuff like cursing and prejudice but, not on this blog; I felt being treated unfairly since all of my statements could be backed on interviews, registered letters, taped conversations and such. I wanted to know for sure.

So I´m not to write long comments sharing my thoughts at the risk of having it just dismissed as lies, I care about my time and efforts. I´m not even sure if this post is going to endure. It’s an awful felling…

Yes, Roger, I’m 24, father and me Americans, mother and little brother Brazilians; I live in Brazil since the age of 7 but we come and go. “perdedor” in Brazil is just a current state - in such a positive way that’s is mostly used as “bom perdedor” (good sport). In America it’s more like a curse that is stick with you for life - a social misfit and unable to accomplice anything worth of justifying you existence (wow!).

Thanks Charlie and others for the good amicable chat! Happy new year everyone again!

Charles Perry

Dear Riogringa and Roberto
I checked your blog one more time before shutting off the computer. It was nice to see a brand new entry, which is a touching, personal message, for us BPs (blog participants) to get to know you better. Thanks for that.

Sounds like there's been some travelling to & from, for you wonderful people.

Back in the days I went to Brazil, airlines couldn't guarantee a direct flight to certain cities. Inevitably you had to go through Rio or Sao Paulo, even if the city destination was significantly closer to the US, north and northwest of the Rio-SP corridor. It took up to DOUBLE the total travel time, for a destination that would have been as quick and easy as a direct Orlando-Rio flight.

I wonder if the routes are any different now?

rodrigo

Happy new year Rachel, but in 2010 it would be good if you to update your age in the blog! There is long time you have just 24 years age!

Julia

Hi Rachel,

I hope you dont hate me for the last post :)

happy new year!!! I wish you all the best in 2010, I have read the excitement of when Eli's arrival was delayed, when he got his permanent residency, and it is funny, how I have somehow been following your life. We don't share the same opinions in Sean's case, but I have a lot of respect for you and trully wish you all the best.

I have also just received my Green Card, after being here for only 2 years and it was issued in 6 months. Just crazy how fast it went, and how efficient is the US.... (just like Brazil isn't it? :)). I receive it in 2 days in my home with a welcome letter! I could only smile. US can be so efficient!!!! Just unbelievable.

Let's hope 2010 will be a great year to all of us!

Bishop

Rachel, it has been quite enjoyable reading about your adventures, first in Brazil, and now back in the US. As a student of Intercultural Communication and an admirer of Latin America (in which I include Brazil) I have found your writing a fun resource to expand my knowledge. I hope things continue to only get better for you and Eli in the new year. Here's to an ever-smaller world with more understanding and compassion between people of all origins and cultures!

-Ed

Ernest Barteldes

Happy 2010 to you and Eli...

Kevin

Julia,

== Even though I know you have the opinion that he was BARRED from seeing him son (and you can say I am being brainwashed by globo, which is not the case. I live in teh US and even when I was home I never watched it). I don't buy it.

Why not? We have all the legal documents proving he had been fighting to see his son since the commencement of his abduction. We have the court decison whereby Brasilian judges noted some examples where the Brasilian family hopped around and tried to waste David's time by setting up visitation dates and then cancelling at the last second. We have phone recordings of the grandmother answering the phone and then hanging up in David's face.

But you have a different opinion because.....?

== He had the address, he went to Brazil. If I were a father, I would have entered with the processed to see the child, which is what he did when Bruna died and he was granted the permission to see him.

This is similar to an argument my sister-in law made last week. She tried telling me and the extended family that David Goldman was very rich and could afford to have flown down to Brasil any time he wanted to. Her evidence? David owned three boats! Owning a boat might be a sign of wealth in Brasil, but in the USA, every redneck and his dog has a boat.

The fact is David was struggling financially BECAUSE he was forking out so much money on attorney costs and trips to Brasil. JPLS knew that his pockets were much deeper than David's so he tried to milk him dry of his funds early on. After being denied visitation on his first two trips, David's attorney's advised him not to go again until the legal proceedings had taken its course. But then Bruna died, and the situation was quickly showed into overdrive as JPLS tried to become the legal father and change Sean's name. That is when national exposure along with donations for BSH increased dramatically. That is when the Brasilian courts ordered JPLS to provide visitation for David.

== Again, I have no access to the actual documents, so I dont know if he had tried or not.

Gee, what a surprise. This is what really blows my mind about some Brasilians. You admit having no access to evidence for either opinion, but you're dogmatic about sticking to one of them for no particular reason at all. You think that all opinions are equal. All you have to do is assert something, no matter how ignorant or fact-free it might be, and suddenly it has to be respected as much as any other opinion. This is what my sister-in-law said after saying David was rich. "It is my perspective, everyone has a different perspective." I don't think some Brasilians understand what the word "perspective" means. It is generally something people develop from an interpretation of the facts. It isn't an opinion manufactured strictly from a need to believe. I think the word you're looking for is "belief" or pehaps "fantasy."

After all, what if I assert the Moon is made of cheese? Is that a valid perspective? Or what about the moron on Orkut who just asserted that David Goldman was a pedophile, but they were not allowed to share this information due to Brasilian law? Should this idiotic nonsense be respected and consider equal to all other opinions based on facts that strongly suggest he was a caring and loving father? I think not.

== I personally dont think he did. You will say he did.. how do you know? Because he said so...
He said so shortly after the abduction, through the first two years of the abduction, his attorneys said so during that time, the documents say the same thing, the Federal judges said the same thing in their decision, etc.

Now in which universe is an opinion based on the facts above, trumped by your opinion based on an admitted "I have no access to the actual documents, so I dont know if he had tried or not"?

== I dont trust a word that comes out of his mouth (even though I do agree that Sean should be returned).

Well that is your problem, not ours. David has not been shown to lie about anything. The Brasilian family has been shown to have lied on numerous occassions. Their own country's judges noted their attempts to deceive, even if their own media refuses to mention it.

== For me David Goldman sounds fake, but thats only my personal opinion, maybe in real life, when he is relaxed, he actually a good guy.

AH, so now we come to the heart of your evidence. He "sounds fake"? Is this a respectable position to take? Most everyone I know thinks David is the most genuine person they've seen on TV in years. This is why 80% of Brasilians are on his side. Your perspective is shaped by your preferences, not by the evidence. You prefer that he be lying, so you assert that he is and expect that your assertion be given just as much credence as those asserting he honest.

== I just find sad that people think she is evil and cant have any compassion and no one asks why she left!

We have constantly dealt with the question WHY she left. To most Brasilians who understand the type of person she was and the class of people she came from, this is no real mystery why she left.

== I find it really hard to believe that her life here was so great...

It wasn't if you comnpare it to how she had it in Brasil. But it was pretty decent if you consider the fact that they were both employed, had a home paid for, neither were starving, etc. Modeling is a tough industry when you're pushing 40, and David hit his bumps along the way. A true loving wife would cosnider this before marriage and accept the rocky road ahead of trying to make ends meet by getting second jobs. But when she caught a glimpse of the glamorous world that awaited her in Brasil, with the help of JPLS, she was tempted to sacrifice her marriage and the psychological well-being of her son, for a glamorous life in Brasil. And this is proved by the fact that this is precisely what she ended up getting.

She was instantly given a ton of money by JPLS to start her own clothing business, selling clothes she had designed as a fashion student. Her stores are dotted all over the city. She immediately started rubbing elbows with famous celebrities like Nivea Stelmann, Luciano Huck, Otavio Mesquita, etc. You don't get to be included in that elite circle by accident.

== I dont think the problem was because she had to do the dishes. This is too much of a simplistic way to face facts.

That was part of it, but not all of it. Those of us who know better understand that even middle class Brasilians are expecting a maid to wash clothes, do dishes, clean the house, etc. In the USA, only the ultra rich bother to hire live-in maids, and they do so because they work outside too much and don't have time to do it themselves. In Brasil, middle and even lower class families hire maids to do everything while the family sits around the house doing nothing. You can't even buy a house in Brasil that doesn't come with a maid's quarters - usually at the far end of the house with a tiny room connected to the laundry room and a tiny bathroom -because it is just expected that if you can afford a house, you're going to have a maid.

== And if her family was that rich as also everyone likes to say ( I have no access to their bank account, but I don't think they are millionaire), she would have an easier life here as well.

Her wealth came primarily from marrying one of the richest and more famous attorney's in Brasil. She met him when she was married and living with David. Also, JPLS was still married to his first wife at the time. According to JPLS's testimony:

"I met Bruna again through a mutual friend from college right after she returned to the US. At that time I was separated from my first wife. We had similar stories, we weren’t happy in our marriages for a few similar reasons and maybe through this life experience we understood each other very well. In less than six months after we met again, we were living together."

What I found even more interesting is this constant talk about how she and JPLS never had a fight or argument, and he verifies this as well: "Bruna told me all the time that I was “the husband she chose.” We loved each other the whole time and there was never a moment of sadness."

So she "chose" David for sex, but "chose" JPLS for marriage? Nonsense. She chose David because he was an international American model who had posed with high profile models like Heidi Klum and Claudia Schiffer. A Brasilian model who had been doing this would be rich by definition, but it turns out David wasn't living the life of the rich and famous in New Jersey.

Earth to Brasilians: If you never have an argument in a marriage, it isn't a marriage. I mean, this is obvious to any marriage therapist. It is unhealthy to NEVER have an argument in basic realtionships, but to never do so within a marriage strongly suggests something else is going on. It is something else, something artificial. I suspect she was using him for his money and his profession in order to help her kidnap Sean, and he was using her as a trophy wife like is so often the case with unattractive men who are extremely wealthy. He didn't even live with Sean, so how often did he really live with Bruna? This sounded like a union designed by convenience and destiny, not romance or love.

Bruna's "love" was for sale, and JPLS was by far the highest bidder. Not only could he guarantee she would never have to clean another dish or make another bed, he would instantly make her dreams come true by providing her with her own business to run. A business that would thrust her into the spotlight with all the other famous Brasilian celebrities.

Julia

Hi Kevin, this page is a page for Rachel's sum of 2009, I personally dont think it is nice to have this post here... why dont you transfer to the previous one? In any case, I will probably not reply anytime soon, it is too long, but I will read your opinions, which are different from mine. But people have different opinions, they need to be respected :)

happy new year for you too.

Ernesto

Rachel, I wish you a great 2010.

Great success with the blog, and let's pray for a reduction in the number of idiot trolls *coughrsidneycough*.

Simone

Simone

I make Ernest's words my own! Too bad, these pointless comments have invaded your blog recently. That said, I just wanted to wish a fantastic 2010. :D

Muita saúde, paz, amor e felicidade!!!

Melissa

Dear Rachel,

I *heart* 'end-of-year reflections' blog posts, so I really enjoyed reading your summary on this post! Looks like 2009 was a monumental year for many people. It's great that you can look back all on the events of the last 12 months and ultimately see the year in a positive light.

Thank you for sharing your life, hopes, plans, knowledge and opinions with the online world. I wish you and Eli all the very best for 2010 - a new year and a fresh decade!

Kevin

While Roberto is complaining that his posts have been removed, I'll go ahead and vote in his favor and say let them stand. While they are usually riddled with lies and distortions of facts, they present us with opportunities to correct and dispell common myths that have quickly gained favor in Brasilian circles.

I corrected several of his lies on the Good vs. Evil thread and it has apparently rendered him speechless. If I had seen his recent posts that were deleted, I would have corrected those as well.

We're dealing with a Brasilian kid who likes to regurgitate sound bites from Brasilian media and present them as facts.

Carlos

Rachel,

Happy New Year.

As someone who's a lot older (don't ask) and who himself relocated to the United States after spending some time of his young adulthood in Brazil to start a new life (again, don't ask, since I am a native Brazilian), I know how it's tough to start from scratch.

You returned to one of the world's most competitive job markets at a time the country is mired in the worst financial/economic crisis since the Great Depression. There have been improvements, but as I'm sure you're quite well aware, foreclosures and unemployment stats are still quite high.

You will eventually find a full-time job. I myself started out temping, so my heart goes out to you - I went a few years (literally) as a temp; the cash was great, the overtime pay even better, but it absolutely stank not to have benefits.

If there are any words of encouragement that I can provide, they are: you are still a very young person. You have much time to rebuild your finances, to beef up your resume, to go to grad school, to find more about yourself so you can make more accurate choices regarding your future.

Congratulations on the marriage; best wishes to you two, and thanks again for enlightening so many of us with your witty and humorous comments about life in Rio. You taught this Brazilian a lot about his homeland and culture; I still travel to Brazil, but after having spent so much time in the United States, I do need to be "re-Brazilianized" on occasion... that's why I come to Brazil whenever I can, and your blog certainly helped.

All the best!

Rio Gringa

Thank you all for your kind words and advice. It has been a rough year, and I wish the best for all of you in 2010! Feliz Ano Novo!

Ashley, the Accidental Olympian

Wow it sounds like you had QUITE the year!

Here's to 2010, a year with fewer bumps, stresses, blemishes, arguments, tears and worry.

Ok, maybe the blemishes thing is sort of more just my own personal goal, but let's just go with it.

David

gringa

Please tell us more about Silvana Bianchi, and what she things is not final about the Sean Goldman case...

cheers,

David

that would be "thinks" -- my typo...

A bit more:

* am I alone in thinking that there is an unpunished crime here? (Abduction.)

* I work in the legal industry. Am I crazy to think that Silvana and LeS could be indicted in the US? Thats what would happen if the issue were 100% domestic in either country.

* Gringa (and others)what is teh cultural engine which causes Silvana and Tostes to thib k that there is a battle of quality parenting, or of "dividindo irmãos"?

* why do some other blogs (and Tostes, by his comments) think that impugning Goldman as materialistic, or self oriented? It looks more like the other way around?

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